Have To Put This Out There...RANT!!

[rammerjammer]

Hey Guys,

I hope everyone is having a wonderful, sunny, not hot weekend.

It was 97 degrees here today, with a heat index of 105. First day the water in the pool has been really warm!!

Anyway, I hope I don't offend anyone by this, but I need some feedback. It's kinda long, as well.

When I got married two years ago, I didn't know a whole lot of 'girls' to be in my wedding. I'm not a 'woman' person. It takes me awhile to warm up to another woman, and then when I do, she's stuck for life! I feel intimidated by most women.

Anyway, I had met this girl through one of my DH's friends, and we became somewhat close. When it came time for my wedding on the beach, she offered to do all of my decorations, and flowers. I offered to pay her, and she said we'd settle up later.

The decorations were BEAUTIFUL!! After the wedding, mom wrote her a check, and that was it. We didn't get a wedding present from them, and that was fine.

We hung out some for the next year. Then, all of a sudden, she turned a 180. I don't know what I did, but I began distancing myself from her. The move to Al from TN helped a lot...for that's where she lived.

She's getting married, next weekend, FATHER'S DAY weekend, 9 hours from where I live. She was in my wedding, and I offered to put her up for the weekend then, but she declined. For her wedding, which I'm not in...(that's fine She wanted us to pay the $300 to stay on the property where she's getting married. Fortunately, we have friends to stay with.

I've had a LOT going on the last few months, two moves in five months, the loss of a dog, unpacking a house, trying to find work, dealing with serious health problems, and health problems of family members, and other things. I forgot to send her invitation in.

I had tried to contact her a few times when we bought this house...she's an interior decorator, and I wanted her opinion. She never emailed/called me back. I tried to invite her to the Memorial Day party..no response. This sort of thing has been going on for a year, where she wouldn't get back with me.

I got an email from her last week stating 'Where's my RSVP?'. I told her I forgot, to put us down, and didn't hear from her again.

Well, at this point, the wedding is looming, and I feel like we have to get her a gift, for sure, since she did so much for me. I'm forgetting that mom paid her.

I don't want to go to this wedding, since it is FD, and my dad is going through the worst time of his life right now. I need to be with him, and he's three hours away.

I emailed her on Thursday night, asking her where they were registered. LESS than two hours later I had a response. Which, ticked me off to begin with. She won't answer emails that have anything to do with me, or something she doesn't deem 'important enough' but she answered this one in a flash.

Her response to my question was....pay attention here...

"We're not registered anywhere. We want monetary gifts."

I about fell off my bed!! You DO NOT ask for money for gifts in that situation...ie wedding/baby shower/graduation, etc....EVER!!

I know this is not a 'Southern Thing', so I know she knows better. Please, please tell me that I'm right!!

My first instinct was to put a $1 in a nice card, and mail it to her. Second is to buy her a gift, candlesticks, picture frame, etc.

And, I REALLY don't want to go to this wedding now!!

Help me out here guys...what's your opinion on the whole thing? What should I do?

Sorry for the long post, and the rant...but just had to get some advice. My DH of course, doesn't really get it....and he wants to go to the wedding out of loyalty to the fiance.

Thanks!!

[Cathy]

I don't blame ya one bit, hun. She sounds very spolied to me. lol Asking for cash gifts as wedding presents is just not good etiquette...or manners. If I were you...I wouldn't go. THEN you can get away with just sending a gift lol because usually if you are't attenting a wedding, monetary gifts are not expected.
She couldn't be bothered with ya to even answer other e-mails, then to heck with her. Its obvious she is all about herself.
JMHO.
*hugs*
Cathy

[thekid1116]

I agree she sounds very selfish I wouldnt go to the wedding either

[Jen]

Ya know I have to agree with the other ladies. Dont go, send a gift and pfftt. lol

[rammerjammer]

Well, we went, for my DH is friends with the groom. We were staying with some mutual friends, and the bride/groom knew this. On our way up, we called the people we were staying with to see if they wanted to go eat. He said....'Uhh...we're going to the rehearsal dinner.' So....that left us with nothing to do for five hours. The bride and groom were both in our wedding. I didn't want to be in the stupid wedding, but she could have asked us to the dinner for she knew we would be in town without anywhere to go.

After the wedding, we had to help her lug her stuff back to her cabin...my husband volunteered. It was a 180 degree incline to her cabin. My Jag didn't like it. It quit on the way out. We had to sit at a gas station for seven hours waiting on a tow. Then, we had to ride with the tow four hours to Huntsville, where my mom had left me a car. Drove the three hours home, not getting in until five am Monday morning. All in all, a CRAPPY weekend!! Then, my laptop quit, and now I have stupid flying ants all over my kitchen!!! Not my week.

Hope everyone else is having a great week!!

Melena